Leavenworth Bulletin from Leavenworth, Kansas • 3

PUMPKIN SWINDLES. THE CHILD Wit. ABOUT CEREAL FOODS. mm. mm RURAL MAIL DELIVERY.

Little Nettie accompanied her pa. ents on a trip across the lake recently, and after being out a short1 distance she began to get seasick, "ffow do you feel, Nettle?" asked mamma. "Oh," wus the reply, "1 Just feel like I wanted to unswellow my breakfust." "No, thank you, I don't care for any," said little Marie, as her papa passed the cake. "Why, dear," said he, "I thought you were fond of coke "So I am," she replied, "but I heard mamma say it wasn't quite perfect, and when she says Avreelag with Bar. "Don't you think, Leonidas," said Mr.

Meekton's wife, "that women ought to be assisted in leading a perfectly in-dependent and uutramiueled exist Idarht Throws on aa Industry That lias Contributed Wonders to Oregon County Fairs. "Let no one open his mouth from astonishment the next time he sees a big 100 or 200-pound pumpkin at a county fair. It's all a fake, and the pumpkins are not on the square." Thus spoke a man who had recently been in Prineville, the pumpkin center of Oregon. He further relieved his mind to an Oregonian reporter as follows: "Now, I have always at county fairs looked with amazement at the monstrous squashes and rutabagas and pumpkins, and thought how great ia nature, slightly aided by man's skill in obtaining a high state of culture. But I always thought these big vegetables were square, not in form, but that they were 'on the and now I know that we always have been Jobbed.

ence?" A Problem to Her. "Are you good at arithmetic, my tear?" asked Mr, Perkasie of hii wile. "1 wui accounted the very best arithmetician at replied Mrs. Perkasie with a touch of pride in her voice. "i have a problem for you." 1 "State it." "llow can I buy $93 worth of presents with $15 in cush and no credit?" The Are Prepared la Scores of Wafa and Form a Valuable Addition to (ho Dally Diet.

It has been conceded by thoso whs have made dietary matters a study, that the stomach is helped, and digestive conditions improved, by on alternating diet of the various grains for breakfast food. There is such a great variety in cereal preparations to draw from, and these too can be cooked in so many different ways, tbat there is absolutely no reason- for the consumer becoming tired, with a monotonous diet It is not generally understood by housekeepers that any cereal, with the exception of samp or hulled corn, after it has been well boiled, set aside to-cool, cut in slices and dipped in beaten egg, can be fried 41 most delicate brown, without hardening or toughening the cereal, thus making a most delicious dish for breakfast or luncheon. Barley meal used in this way gives a The Post Office Department About to Try a Unique plan to Test Its Usefulness. The advocate of a system of rural mail delivery will be much encouraged by en experiment which the post office department proposes to inaugurate soon. The scheme takes the form of a traveling post office and specifications for the necessary kindof a vehicle will be issued in a few day.

It is expected that the exterior will somewhat resemble the modern ooumtry stage coach, with three windows on a side, and will be labeled "United States Mail," inconspicuous-letters. The body will be eight feet long, four feet across, ond Just high enough for a man six feet tall to stand erect inside. It will be a very light running conch, weighing but GOO pounds, and adapted to oil kinds of weather rain, hail, snow or blow, bllzznrdsi or red-hot summers. Tlhe personnel will consist of but two the traveling postmaster and his driver. The i uunge.

En Paaaant. A mald-her name I will not give For years had dyed that she might live. 8he dyed her cheeks, she dyed her lips, And she likewise dyed her linger tips. But she died at last and left a store Ot ayes, and now she'll dye no more. Chicago Dally News.

DISINTERESTED COUNSEL. "Will you believe me when I tell you that I found a man out in Prineville who had established an industry of furnishing pumpkins of a given weight "Certainly, Henrietta," was the answer, "and 1 presume -that is why bo many of them consent to get married." Washington Stan English Livery Stable Joke. Job Master I'm afraid, sir, 1 must usk you to pay la advance for the hire of the horse. Amateur liider What's that for? Are you afraid tbat I shall come back without the horse? Job Master Oh, no; but the horse might come back without you. Tit-Hits.

DUiioalllled. 'Toor Mrs. Motherderel" exclaimed' Mr. Meekton's wife. "What has happened to her?" "She bad to decline our invitation to read a paper on the proper management ot children because she was too busy looking after her family Washington Star.

The Social Whirl. Trotler What has become of Struck-ile? When 1 left he was making desperate efforts to get into the first society. Homer By the time he got in the that it must be something awful. "Now, Tommy," said the teacher, "can you tell me what a propaganda is?" The little fellow looked at the celling and wrinkled his brow as he bravely wrestled with the problem, and finally replied: "1 don't know for sure, but I think it must be a proper goose's brother." "Oh, look what a pretty little moon!" exclaimed four-year-old Edith to her little brother, as she looked from her grandma's window at the small crescent in the western sky. "Pshaw replied the unappreciatlve brother, "I don't think it's half as pretty as the big round moon we had at home two weeks ago." Johnny, nged five, had a habit of using in his conversation every big word he happened to hear, regardless of its meaning.

One morning he and his older brother were trying to wash from the sarae basin, to Johnny's detriment, and he ran into the kitchen, exclaiming: "Mamma, Charley's metrop-olizing the whole laudatory I "Chicago Daily News. FLASHES OF THOUGHT. latter will be mounted upon an ample companion dish to the fried sausage, as novel as it is tasty. The variety of ways of manufacturing the raw grains, i. finely ground, coarsely ground, rolled, toasted, seems to impart a different" flavor to the same grain when cooked.

Barley Barley flour, barley meal, pearled barley, rolled barley. Buckwheat Buckwheat meal, groats or hulled buckwheat. Corn White corn flour, white corn bolted meal, white corn granulated meal, white corn grits, white corn hominy or cracked corn, white corn whole corn, white corn rolled, or flaked hominy, white corn lye hominy. Popcorn Popped and ground. Yellow corn flour, yellow corn bolted meal, yellow corn granulated.menl, yellow corn grits, yellow corn lye hulled hominy.

Oats Oat flour, fine oatmeal, coarse oatmeal, oat groats, rolled oats. Eice Eice flour, broken rloe, whole or head rice, flaked or rolled rice. Eye Eye meal, cracked rye, rolled rye. Wheat Wheat middlings or farina. people who then composed the best to ambitious farmers who desire to take prizes at the county fairs? How does he grow them? Simple enough, when you know how.

This pumpkin manufacturer feeds the pumpkins milk, just good, rich milk, and when the pumpkin has grown to the weight called for in his order from the ambitious farmer he cuts it from the vine and turns it over to the one ordering it. "This is the manner in which he does it: Every day he fills a quart measure with milk, places it on the ground, and connects it with a slit in the pumpkin vine with a rubber tube. The vine draws in the milk by capillary or some other attraction, and the vine thrives and it grows to enormous proportions. "It was extremely interesting to go out in the evening to the pumpkin factory and see the owner feed the pumpkins. The vines hnd become so used to it and appeared to like the milk so -well that they actually rustled as the man with the milk approached, and the big, broad leaves waved in a transport of delight; and, when the milk had been consumed, the vines settled down for the night as contentedly as a band of cows chewing their cuds." Portland Oregonian.

SAFE WATER GATE. society hnd bursted up, so he's now as badly off as he was before. a. X. Weekly.

An Economical Version. She What do you mean by giving me VY Ti 1 4 AiiMl an imitation Russia leather pocket- book He Imitation is the sincerest flat tery, is it not? Detroit Free Presa His Marriage. An astronomical event Is scheduled very soon; The world will shortly be eollpsed Behind a honeymoon. Puck. GREAT LUCK.

toasted middlings or farina farinose cracked wheat, steel cut wheat, rolled or flaked wheat. This does not enumerate any of the fanciful or special trade names given to these grains by manufacturers. One of the most delicious cereals, seldom used in the average household, except for gruelB or in soup, is barley, which, when' boiled or steamed, and served like rice, and eaten as a vegetable, with butter and salt, will be found a most acceptable addition to the table. During the cold weather the Ger- A DELIGHTFUL HIGHWAY. (Road Leading from Maysvllle to Lexington, Ky.) seat in front, sheltered overhead and Virtuous men alone possess friends.

Voltaire. Delay in vengeance gives a heavier blow. John Ford. To be proud of learning is the greatest ignorance. Colton.

The knowledge of thyself will preserve thee from vanity. Cervantes. There is small revenge in words, but words may be greatly Franklin. Friendship is a plant that loves the sun and thrives ill under clouds. Alcott.

Whatever makes men good Christians makes them good citizens. Daniel Webster. Who hath not known ill fortune, never knew himself or his own virtue. Mallet. A wise man neitr er suffers himself to be governed or attempts to govern others.

La Bruyere. Mankind in the gross is a gaping monster that loves to be deceived, and has seldom been disappointed. Mackenzie. You cannot give an instance of a man, who is permitted to lay out his own time, contriving not to have tedious hours. Johnson.

Were we as eloquent as angels, yet should we please some men, some women and some children much more by listening than by talking. Colton. Try to be happy in this very present moment and put not off being so to a time to come, ns though that time should be of another make from this, which is already come, and is ours. Fuller. PRODUCTS OF THE SOUTH.

A Self-Adjusting Device Which Saves Lots of Work and a Heap of Worry. The generality of gates along smalt streams consist of a it Jg pole set in crotches with gates suspended with wires or chains or else wires stretched, protected an wet weather by a water proof covering, jiintrance io me iu-terior of the vehicle will be by a door on either which when sihut will serve as the center of the tlhree across the creek, all of which in time of high water catch full of drift or wash mans, Hungarians and Poles imake onJ aiA HAiittlA.tma 1 1 fill 1 ,11. and troublesome out entirely are very most nourishing porridge with; boiling Leli JUU cat iuu ill ulu uunc, juu eure to be ill. St. Paul's, Unbeaten.

Who Is the lightweight champion? I Whe? Why, bless your soul, The man In summer who soils ice, 1 And In winter time sells coal. -N. Y. Journal. SpeakfuK from Experience.

Pupil 1 wonder how it is that the blind receive more consideration from us than the deaf? The Philosopher The reason ia plain, my son. It is because they are able to listen to our old stories and yet are unable to eee our shady actions. Ally Bloper. One or the Other. Miles I'm celebrating the fortieth anniversary of my birth to-day.

Giles And yet, judging from your appearance, no one would take you for fool. Miles Why, what do you mean? Giles Nothing only you're not a philosopher, are you? Chicago Keoord. Hard Lack. Visitor It's sad about the man who was fsund dead in bis room from blowing out the gas. Hotel Manager Yes, it'stoo bnd.

Kobody has claimed the body, and as he paid his last dollar for the room we don't know who is going to pay for the gas. Chicago Journal. Winter Wenther. The crimson of the forest leaves When the autumn days are gone, But the toper's nose grows redder As the winter weareth on. Tammany Times.

MORE TRAIN WRECKING. to keep in repair so as to turn stock. The accompanying cut represents the half; milk and buckwheat groats. Although, largely used in this way by foreign population, we have yet to know of it even being tried by Americans, i of a gate which will do away with all of -this trouble, for it is self-adjusting. In time of high water it will open up and Eesults point out that "we should let the water and drift all through and vary our diet to keep ia perfect health, as the creek runs down the gates will and although we may Dot at, first take close, being constructed so that the brace-rod (A) is set on the opposite side kindly to a change of cereals', Btill this, like any other habit, can be cultivated, Eobert Mitchell Floyd, in New Eng land Grocer.

glassi windowe. These windows and another in front will make the office aa light as may be desired by day, while a blazing lamp will do Tlhe same by night. The postmaster will be seated in the center of hi office upon a revolving chair made stationary with the floor. Both before and behind him will be a working table and a complete at of post office pigeon holes. Under ordinary circumstances he will ride with his back toward the driver, there being more room at his rear table than at the front.

Just above the rear table will be a closet with double doors. Inside will be shelves, a cash drawer, and drawers for storing stamps, postal envelopes, oancelersi and other necessities, including a trusty gun for protection against tbe bold highwayman. Grouped about thisclosej, will be the smaller pigeon holes, among which of the post at from which the gat AN HOUR WITH BABY. First Klondiker You say you've struck great luck; did you find gold? Second Kiondiker No, 1 found I piece of bacon that somebody left ii this hole. Boston Herald.

Two Simple Gowns for Mamma, and Her Youngest Pet to Wen Until Afternoon. Hi mail matter for the rural inhabitants having houses or collection and deliv A very fashionable matron, of Kev York city makes it a rule to spend at least an hour each day in amusing her children. Just before midday is the hour devoted to the youngsters, for they are not yet old enovfgh to attend school and mother and little ones have simple morning dresses. The mother wears a gown of dark red cashmere trimmed with black ery boxes along the route between post It is only recently that any attention has been paid to the rice crop of Texas, but it is demanding notice. An acre of rice returns about $50 a crop.

Capitalists are trying to get Florida farmers to go into cassava raising. Starch will be manufactured from it. Three tons to an acre at $20 a ton is the golden promise held out. From Southern Pines, N. during the past season there were shipped by express 2,548 crates of blackberries, crates of peaches and 7,505 crates of grapes.

The pineapple crop in one district alone of Florida is estimated at $50,000 offices- will be distributed alphabetical Deception. The man who dyes his hair and beard Has finally to own, Thinking others lie defcetves, That he deceives himself alone. Detroit Journal. Hud a Unod Time. First Old Boy Let me see, your Ron enjoyed a university career, I believe? Second Old Boy (grimly) Yes, he appears' to have done nothing eise the bills are coming in still.

Ally Sloper. A Hard StrufCtfle. Sympathetic Friend And did yout husband die peaceably? Sorrowing Widow Oh, I'm afraid not. We had three doctors. Chicago Daily News.

Frank Indorsement. Mrs. Hunt From what 1 hear of youi husband, I should infer that he is a man of iron will. Mrs. Blunt You're right he is, and piglron, at that.

Richmond Dispatch. The Pink of Modesty. She I'm not agraid of the best man living! He I hope not, dear. 1 don't think I ever gave you any reason to be afraid of me. Yonkers Statesman.

WATER GATE. is hung, and when the gates are open the outer end is four or five inches higher than when closed, and they will close when the pressure of the water is removed. There is but one bolt in each board, so that the gate will give up when open. When the gate is open the gate head is behind the post and will not catch any drift. At there is a tight panel running at an angle of 45 degrees with the creek, which conducts all of the rubbish through the gates.

The posts can be anchored and fastened to the bank so they will be perfectly secure, or willow trees can be grown for a support in a few years. The Blats want to be set on the opposite side of the gate from which the water comes. A. S. Forsman, in Ohio Farmer.

before January 1. Owners of pineries realize as much from the sale of suckers as from the fruit. Each pineapple plant produces from five to six of these a year, and, separated from the parent plant and planted, they grow into new, strong plants. They sell for ten cents apiece. SHOOTING STARS.

ly. Thus when the new post office on wheels approaches the farm of JosiaJi Bean, that, gentleman's letters can be readily found in pigeon hole and when it come to theibox of Hezekidh Hathaway, who may live several miles up the crossroad, his letters' end papers will be taken from compartment and deposited in the 'ilot of the box bearing his name. Beneath this real working table will be larger pigeon holes, each bearing the name of a regularly established post office on the circuit. Upon arriving at each office the traveling postmaster will take all matter out of the box and present it to his host, the stationary postmaster. This pioneer post office on wheels will be so equipped that it may, if needs be, traverse the country under control of only one man, with composite duties of carrier, collector, postmaster and driver.

All along the route will be distributed letter boxes of a 'novel design, each bearing the name'of its owner, who may fasten it outside tlhe gate leading up his lane or at the point where the road leading to his farm Joins the route of the post office. Farmers' Eeview. IliRhivaye In Porto Rico. Speaking of the roads in Porto Eico, The Beech What's the charge, con stable? Peeler Prisoner wa found putting his wife's mince pies on tne raiivtav FACTS FOR FARMERS. lines, your worsaipi Any siopci.

In a Nutshell. The other day a wise one spoke. Bo the words of wisdom ran: Woman she's always working Embroidery or a man. Puck. Hardened.

A Pessimistic View. In all vocations, it appears. Men plan to cheat and rob; Even an honest builder's work Is, at best, a put-up Job. Chicago Dally News. Stars are light but not very airy things.

The dog star may be said to be a pretty Siriua affair. Why are not the pointers in the Dipper known as dog stars? There 1b but one star tbat adds to the beauty of the sky at the same time it Mars it. The "music of the spheres" grinds on day after day and still no one has been heard to complain, possibly because no Wagnerian stars have yet been known to execute it Our Hibernian friend recently remarked that we didn't need the light of the moon or stars in the day time while we have the sunshire, but that is surely all moonshine. "You are here for forgery?" said the POETICAL EXPRESSION. visitor, "Yes," replied the convict, flippantly.

"I may be said to have forged my fet ters." Broom corn hasbeen on a boom, bringing from $40 to $60 a ton, and even $75, it iB claimed. In working the farm economize in labor and time. A penny saved is two pennies earned. Put weather strips on the doors and windows. If you burn coal they will save you a good deal.

It looks very much as if there would be a scarcity of corn. It is noticeable that many cribs are empty. The most essential substance for promoting egg production is nitrogen. This is best fed to hens in the shape of lean meat. If you have a pond that is a good or can be made a good fish pond, stock it with fish.

Fish culture is astonishingly neglected. They make a cheap and healthful diet. Westers. Plowman. Ccn.

Hoy Stone says: "I can only add that all I have heretofore said in favor The wretch was abandoned to his of the good roads movement, a warning fate. Puck. Two of a Kind. and reproof drawn from a country where, except for a few military lines, "Beg pardon, are you McOrbit, the no roads have ever been built; and where the bulk of the product of a prize lighter?" "Young feller, I am a pugilist, not a SENTENTIOUS SAYINGS. marrelously rich soil is carried to market on the heads of men and women or the backs of diminutive animals.

Aa a result of this neglect, together w'ith other kindred causes, the agricultural prize fighter. Are you one ol them re porters?" "No, sir I am a Journalist." Cin ciuuati Enquirer. TSie Two Extremes. A swell catch the mumps. Pride is the prop of weakness.

Wishes are captive balloons thought. of population of the island, although in dustrious and frugal, is so poor as to be the Modesty is the court livery of Wlggs 1 really can't help smiling when 1 see little Snapleigh out with THE BABY OF THE FAMILY. braid. The skirt hugs the hips closely and is guiltless of either gather or plaits, the seams being gored until they are the measure of the belt. A black silk collar finishes the neck of the waist, which, it may be said, fits skin tight all around the figure.

Baby wears a perfectly plafa slip of pink dotted lawn trimmedwith hemstitching and the little girl ia allowed to have a wrapper made "grown up like mamma's;" while the oldest, a tad of four, wears a lounging robe of striped flannel to imitate the one owned by his father. Nothing makes children happier than this sort of amusement and the garments can be gotten up at little or no cost. In fact the little girl's wrappef may be made from one which has done the mother service. almost without shelter, furniture or clothing, and entirely without supplies cf food, so that their trifling wages roust be paid day by day to enable that lanky wife of his, she looks so aw fully tall with him. Waggs Yes, 1 daresay; but 1 can tell you she's very short with him at them to continue this hopeless exist ence.H Military Road for Cob.

Hlllc and Beef Breeds. The beef-making tissues are distributed all over the body. When beef is making, fat is formed all through and all over the body, and the food digested is distributed impartially. On the other hand, milk-making tissues are concentrated and confined to the mammary gland, or udder, and the working material of the food digested is all directed to this gland, where it is made Into milk. Therefore the more thorough the milk-making function, the less the beef-making power, and vloe versa.

Jersey Bulletin. "Oh, that I had the wings of a Dird. N. Y. Evening Journal.

Ante-Hortem. When he hasn't a brake on his wheel At the top of the hill It Is said That the Inquest may later reveal A very large break In his head. udge. la the Same Uaalnees. "So her husbaud is an editor?" "Yes.

But, good land! If there's anything in the way of news she can beat him publishing it abroad." Baltimore Sun, times. Ally Sloper. lie Saw It, Then. world's royalty. Fame is the magio urn in which, repose the ashes of undying deeds.

Experience is the tack which takes the wind out of the self-inflated "tire." An ounce of patience is worth more than all other home remedies combined. Dissipation and debt are steps by which man descends to the abode of want. A "soft snap" is the preface to a hard-luck story, Cincinnati Commercla) Tribune. A military road is to be built around Jones They say the girl Dawson Santiago and another is to run married was cross-eyed. straight through the city.

Brown Yes; but he never fully re alized 'it until after her money was Buy two or three Concord grape plants and tare francs for tht family. gout. Puck..