The Manhattan Signal from Manhattan, Kansas • 4

inf iwmn ELI PERKINS ON POLITENESS. KAKIM9 A SHORTAGE. 1, "I 1. 3 DRUGGISTS MMj -And- BUn, EOICIHES iiiiiii iMliiii iiiiii: QUI AND fll IS. I I i i i i Glass, Putty, Dyes, Sponges, Brushes, Toilet and Fancy Articles, Combs, Tooth and Hair Brushes, Hand Mirrors, Cosmetics, Etc PAIUIIHIIB ESCIUPTIOnS CQHFQUHDED ACCURATELY 2UID CAREFULLT A PULL mUID AND SOLID BXTOAOTBJf OFPICIKAL TINCTUttES, ELIXIS8, ETC Otir Lubricating Oils Include alio! the best Quality A full line of Patent and PROPRIETA WHICH INCLUDES- Fills, Plasters, Condition Powders Herbs, Barks, Gums, We give especial attention to with disgust writ ton on every lino of his face.

"I was coming out of St. Louis tho other clay, and, the car boirJ2 crowded. I cave half seat to demure little widow." "How do you know she was a wid ow?" She told me bo. She said she was awfully afraid of beir2 robbed, and knowing by uiy liut 1 wa an honest man, tih wanted me to ake charge of nor nortinonaaic until we reached Chicago, "And you did? "Am 1 not a fool? Yes I did. and as sho paused it over sweetly said "There's exactly $90 in it." We rode to Chicaeo without lea-r ing our seats.

Aswerao into the city I handed her purse. She opened it and counted the money. 'Why here isn but $50 here she laid as she looked up at me. "Well, I am $40 short, ai you can see. Perhaps you can explain it the police.

"And what did you do?" "I cave her the 140 of course. Please kick me a few hundred times." "ESOXOMY IS WEALTH" Several traveling men were stop- fmg at a hotel Colorado rocent-y, and ono morning at breakfaBt one of thaxn thought he recognized an old friend in the piece of beefsteak brought him a friend "though lost to sight to memory dear," in other words he surmised that for economy's Bake the Boniface was a repeater, and returned the same pieces of succulent ox that were sent back to the kitchan some times for being too rare or too well done, as the case might be. Communicating his suspicions to his companions, they resolved to make a practical test; so one of them fir ed his piece of steak well with red pepper and sent it back by a waiter, as being altogether too well done. "Bring me a pieoe of steak rare cone, with no gravy, said he, anl don be all day about it. Presently a freight conducts came in and took a seat at the same table.

His order was "beefsteak well done with plenty of gravy, no seasoning, ana hurry up your stumps. The traveling men nudgodeach other when the con-udctor's breakfast promptly appear ed lor tho steak looked suspiciously like? the "doctored" piece, and so proved to be. The conductor saw ed of! a section, placed ii in his mouth and set his masticating machinery in motion. Presently a look of alarm overspread his fea tures, tears came in his eyes, he lowered his bead, and vigorously hred the mouthful under the table, then rinsing his mouth, exclaim ed "By the Great Horn Spoons what kmd of a cook have they got at this shebang?" And eeeing tne saffron-colorod face of the Chinese griddle-greaser at the chunk-hole, he stabbed the section of leathery and highly seasoned meat with his fork and threw it with considerable precision at the aforesaid face and yelled "Hers, you heathen, tako that and save it for hash. And if you critters in thore don't send ine out a good uicy piece, well done, no seasoning, inside of five minutes I'll run into you with a full head of steam on and the throttle open, You hear me" Then the commer cial tourists roared and eiplained their little game, and when all had received what they wanted and har mony reigned, they adjourned to the bar and the conductor told them to "nominate their pizen.

The other evening there were several visitors at Col. Gaduon's bouso The colonel took groat delight in ''showing off" his littlo son, and when the boy appeared at the parlor door the colonel said "Come in, Htmry, Bpeak to the ladies and gentlemen. Ah, that's a man. 'He's a fine said Mrs. Graf tney, one of the visitors Come here, my little man." The boy approached her, and per mitted her to lift him into her la p.

"Why you are heavy. How old are ou "Six years, going cn zeven." "Yes, and you'll soon be a man. What are you going to do whenyw become a man Do like pa '(How does ho do?" "Qh, come times whan ha ccraoi horns at night ho falls over a chair "Henry 1" exclaimed the Colonel. "Falls over a chair, and when maw gits mad he says it's a pretty way for a woman to go on just because a man takes two htm and Every one is affected by polite ness. Onco a gentleman went to Milton, the amhor of "Paradio Lost," a man swd to be umiuscep.

tible to flattery, and said "Mr. Milton, they nay you are the only man in England who can not be flattered." "Do they say that?" said Milton, his face beaming with smiles. My friend Lewis says a peddler called out to a slouchy old woman "Way! Can 1 the lady of the houw "Well, yes you can if vou ain't blind!" mapped the woman who answered the bell, "Oh, beg pardon, madam 1 You are the lady of the house, then?" its, I am I hat vert ake me for? Did yer think I was the gentleman of the house, or tho next loor neighbor, cr one of the farm hands, or the cat, or theke-chcet." "1 didn know, madam, but you might be the youngest daughter." "Uh, did ysr? Well, that wg nat'ral, too," replied the lady of the house. ''What d'yer want, sir?" Then the peddler displayed his wares, and when ha left the door step half an hour later, hiB face was full of pleasure and his pockets rail of money. He understood human nature and had made a good sale.

Fon pure blood use Bums' Blood Purifier. THE PiCSEERJAM'S WIVES. The true farmer's wife, and there are thousands of them scattered through the West in happy; little homes, haa done as mach in her quiet way toward the development of our Gtato from the frontier to the farmland -as her sturdy husband and sons. Her work, though largely unseen, has been no less effective. It shows in the upbuilding of heme interests and all that goes to make up purity andhappiness in the community.

It manifests itself in the thrifty economy of those who are to make the wiv3 of coming farmers and In the integrity and industry of tho sons who will some time tako their father's place in the field and furrow. The West owes as much to tho farmer's wife as it does to the farmer himself, but the results have too often been obtained at the expense of the worn outlives of the faithful women 'who have been pioneers in the possession nf civilization and development. Hats City, December 13, 1885. Beggs' Cherry Cough Syrup is the best I have. II.

B. Kuhl, Druggist. A SAIN OF 25 PER CENT. You want your stock to look well. You want them to be healthy.

Yon want them to gain flesh rapidly. You want to get the best prices when sold. You want the largest possible gain with as little food asia necessary, do you not? Of course you do Every stock feeder who is alive to his interests is experimenting to get the above results. Every person knows that it is not the amount eaten, but the amount assimilated, that goes to increasa flesh and create fat. HeDce, any thing that will assist the stomach in digging food, is simply a gain of food, becauHO it requires a less amount to accomplish tho same results.

There is a gain of 25 per cent, by feeding Hawkeys Conpitiom Powders in the simple item of in creasing flesh, say nothing about the fact that it makes them lees liable to disease and death. Make the experiment of separating your stock and feeding one lot Hawkbye Con-pition Powders, letting the others go without. The increase will be largely with those which are fed the powders. These are experiment whioh every feeder can try and ho will find the results emiuently satisfactory. Simpson and his wife wore on their way to church, and tho lady wca putting on her gloves.

"My dear," said he pettishly, "you should complete your toilet a home. I'd just as soon sea a woman putting on her stockings on the street as putting on her gloves." "Most men would" she said promptly, and tbo abasn-edhusband didn't say another word. Ths Lightning artist has secured a photograph of a pistol bullet ia its flight. Ho will next try to catch a shadow of a man's woek'a salary when his wifo, desirous of a new bonnet, has got the wealth in her possession. linos' Live a Pills do not gripe and are splendid regulating medi-eine for constipation, eta.

4'" ft our intention to plact ontlie market, a full Line of FLUID EXTRACTS and ELIXIRS, selected fnm mne but the freshest and bast drugs ob' ta iiuible. That a rc prepared careful! a nd under our dis red mpevvision, and we gwiinnifiv everything from our laboratory to be of the best quality. In writing prescrip- lions for Fluid Extracts, Elixirs, and in ordering plmsa specify B. D's. Very Respectfully, DcWitt Manufacturing Pharmacists.

Sioux City, Iowa. When in tewn pjonse call and ex an.no our stock of goods. You Will find all the novelties of the season and at prices which will be sure to meet your approval. It is fen to stand on a street cor ner a fma afternoon and watch the men all rushing around trying to make money, and ths women all floating around trying to spend it. A Map and gentle Cathartic, one that dees not gripe, one that regulates the bowcJs, cures constipation and liver complaint, is Bsaas' Yko-BTAiLK LmtR Pills.

Sugar coated, nuall, of oviform shape, which renders them much easier swallowed than the common round pill. A at Colchester closed hia doors and afihed outside the following notice: "Gone to Mer Bea regatta open again at 7 o'c! The hour having passed aiK. i ho engagement to open at 7 having been broken, some cruel wsg appended to the above notice in largo characters, "Drunk and can't get home." MIJHES3TUMLD STATE, "Your beau seems very uaid a Hi. Paul mamma to her daughter. "Bashful echoed the daughter; "lashful's no name for it." "Why don't you encourage him a littlo more Borne men have tc be taught how to do their courting.

He's a good catch." "Encourage him!" aM the daughter: "he cannot take the moat palpable hint. Why, only last night, hen I sat all alone on the sofa, and he perched up in a chair as far away as he could get, I asked him if he didn't think it striate that a man's arm and a woman's waist seemed always to be the same knsfth, and what do you think he did?" "He asked me if I could find a piece of etring so we conld measure and see if it was so. Ain't he horrid?" Pixplks, Bbtohea, Sore Eyes, bkin Eruptions, Boils, etc, are simple indications that the blood is in a horriblo condition. If the blood is pure it in impossible for them to appear. While these impurities remain, the system is in a dangerous condition.

Ths blood is poisoned, disea se is gaining more force, often scrofula is developed, and it may result in oraimi- Ibl lUDOtlCCD. lliig URtUif 1UUCI efforts to unload this poison from the circulation, the system has not the strength to do rt, and fails an easy prey to some disease which is developed and fed by it. This tired, languid feeling, which is often accompanied by lover, loss of appetite, dizziness, sour stomach and constipation is readily overcome by the uss of Beous' Blood Puarma and Blood Makes. It purifies the blood cures dyspepsia, re-invigorates the system, increases the appetite and, assists nature to expel the "poisonous ingredients from the blood. It hsa no equal.

Thousands have testified that they have found it the beat for cleansing the blood of amy preparation they have tried. Largs sovuesone nunored deiei for buying and selecting our goods anJ guarantee them to be of the LIK OF- UALITY. Tobacco, the same at rea- We carry an especial FINE LINKof- Cigars tlanufactured from the best quality of tobacco CSair Oils CHoico IXandkerohief Esrtracta, Perfumery, Sa.oh.ots, Faco Fowdora, Stum oto. Oxir stools aaabracaa Till I TNT (XVWrUing Paper. Blank tlook I LL LlnC Ur Pencils.

Ink. AVhums.ete We always aim to carrv everv ching in our line that the trade de mands and to sell oonable prices. Careful attention given to the com Sounding of Physicians Prescrip ons. We solicit your trade, assur Ing you that no pains will be spared to'give the most COMPLETE SATISFACTION. willia T.E MS I km att a it, Km The Colonel hd ctixti Ida..