Bluff City Tribune from Bluff City, Kansas • 3

"Vhy the Editor Swore, PITH AND POINT. Read This C. B. Franke, of the O. P.

C. has added to his immense stock of Dry Goods, Clothing, Boots and Shoes, No tions and Carpets, an immense stock of New Groceries, which I am selling at the following prices i fiMniilatfld Susrar 12ft. it can say Is that my at correspondingly ExtraC 44 13 1 Arbunkle Coffee per 25 Golden Rio 44 ,.,,.,.,....25 Navy Beans .05 Dried apples .8 Evaporated apples. .12 Plug Tobaccoo per ft 45 Lima Beans, corn etc per can. 10 California peaches, plums, cherries green gages, per can 18 ,...20 ISTMy stock is too large to quote all Laf Merritt, editor of the Bluff City Tribune, has just been tendered by a prominent member of congress the managing editorship of a state campaign organ in Missouri at a large sal-, ary.

Mr. Merritt has friends high up in the present administration. Anthony Daily Republican. But we are too deeply in love with Bluff City and Kansas soil to give up the Tribune just now. There is too much empty glory in running political papers for some one else.

The height of our ambition is for the present attained, for we can imagine no condition that cairies with it such a promise of joy and comfort as that of the country editor owning a newspaper free from the dictation of cliques in a live and growing Kansas town. The idea has long since been put away with that there is anything small in editing a country paper, and nothing can be nobler even at, small tasks than to be aetivelynseful. We can imagine no better wiiyfpr' one to put in his days than in the quiet of a prosperous "country town, out of the mad race tor" notoriety," political honors, place and po We er out of ihfi dusty highway where fools struggle And strive for the hollow praise of fools. Yes, Bluff City Is good "enough for us It has oeeriu thrown in our face that the Tribune "is not loud enough in its praises Bluff There are only; a few however; wTio claim this, and are themselves the very ones who have not given the one dollar's worth of support. We claim to have given three dollars to town in return for one received.

Out of about thirty business firms, ten -have advertisements in the paper, and with the hearty support of all the paper would be receving only a fair compensation for its labors. There are two answers, neither of which are satisfactory, that some men call themselves business men, have for a newspaper man when he solioits advertising. They are "business is too good they do not need it," or is too dull it would not pay. If such men ever have any business it is at the expense of others who do appreciate the value of the press. In this day and time the press is the main factor in building towns and bringing business to support them, and every school-boy knows the better the press is sustained, the more business and the better the town becomes.

In faet, a town is judged abroad ny the business represented in its newspaper. fl prices here All 1 stock will be sold and get prices. I mean what I say that I have come here to stay, and will not be undersold. All goods at eastern prices. Country produce taken in exchange for goods at highest market price.

Yours, C. B. FRANKE. WHAT THE CHINESE DID. Why an Ainer can Humorist is Disgusted Witlx His Fig-Tailed Friends, Have you ever heard of any discovery which was not known centuries ago in China? I have not, although I haye been looking for one with a long-handled microscope, and my young life is being chipped to pieces by the thought that all the yaunted and patented achievements of the white man are nothing but the warmedroyer exertions of the yellow Chinaman, who wears his shirt as an exterior garment and his eves cgt bias.

There is natural gas, for instance, which is making some citie3 of this country so proud of themselves, The Chinese had it centuries ago lot3 of it, more than they wanted. Qne day it broke loose, blew up a section of the empire somewhat smaller than the State of Texas in size, and reduced from five million to ten million Celestials to a state of innocuous desuetude. The Chinese aro never exact in giving figures. A difference of five million, people never worries them, and in dates a difference between a few years and a dozen is quite permissible. Printing is an ancient invention with them, for every little China boy had an amateur outfit as long ago as 4037 years and fivo months.

The Chinese discovery of paper la lost in remote and cobwebby antiquity, but is believed to have occurred just before the surface of the earth had quite cooled off. The Chinese discovered rpllerTskat ing while loah was putting his. milk-teeth, and rRjautiful Snow' was writ? tep. by one of hei poets 340(5. The art of watering railway stock was practiced with precision and sue? cess about forty centuries ago in China, and the B.

O. deal went through its Chinese experience B. 740. The chestnut bell was doing Its deadly work in China 10, 400 years ago, and hash was invented there by Mrs. Yung Wing, whq ran a boarding-house in the Fourth Ward of Shanghai two years, before the flood.

This estimable lady was also the first to introduce India-rubber spring-chicken to the molars of her boarders. The Chinese journalists had worn thq phrase Mdull thud" threadbare several centuries before Eye indulged her appetite for fall pippins. Dudes were quite a curiosity in China in the reign of Hi Mucky 7867 years ago, but they became such a nuisance toward the close of the year 7974 that an imperial edict issued in that year condemned them all to death, They used glass for windows in China a thousand years before houses were built, and inclosed letters in envelopes a few hundred decades be fore any body learned to write letters. The first Chinese sewing machine was patented six weeks before Mrs. Adam made her first fig-leaf gown, but the agent was a little late in reaching Eden with his samples.

A Chinese savant preserved the voice of his mother-in-law in a phonograph as long ago as 8541 B. C. Confucius used the type-writer in concocting letters to his jirl, and when he jilted her she could not collect any damages for breach of promise, because she could not prove his signature. It would not surprise me to learn that Wing Lo Jing, or some other monosyllabic Celestial, completed the Keely motor several hundred years previous to the creation of the world, and became immensely wealthy by placing the stock on the market. The Chinese make me tired.

Wm. 27. Siviter, in Puck. SA1IEI A 0 Chicago ANTHONY, The Cheapest Place in he Skribune $1.50 per Tear in Advance. Bluff City, Kansas.

Thursday, Jan. 19, 1888. Railroad Time Table. St. L.

S. F. R. K. Fkisco Line.

Passeng-ers-JEaet Bound. No. 4 leaves 6 :30 a. m. 6:20 p.

m. West Poqnd. So. 9:05 a. m.

4 3, f.8:53 p. Freights. Xe. 29 aives 8:05 p. m.

leaves ....3:15 p-. jn Arrival and Departure of Mails. Mail the east. A i ves 8 52 t. Departs 6 :30 a.

Mail from the west. Arrives .6:00 p. Departs 8:00 a. OFFICIAL DIRECTORY. County Officers.

Clerk E. S.Riee Treasurer JXF. Casteen Probate Judge Alf II. Addams County Attorney Geo B. Crooker Register of Deeds M.

Vaianing-ham County Superintendent E. Hutchinson Sheriff I. P. Couch District Judge J. T.

Herrick District Clerk F. O. Mott Surveyor H. H. Jenkins Coroner A.

J. McAdams 1 T. H. Stevens Commissioners. It.

H. Echols G.W.Thompson City Officers. Mayor 1. F. O.

Miller Clerk Will C. Barnes Treasurer W. A. Miller Poliee Judge H. Barrett Marshal J.

M. Aldridge 1 W. W. Bird I B. Townsend Council P.

P. Lewis I G. Young J. R. Porterfield Go to C.

E. Myers' for barbed wire. Sp-e Pranke's nice selection of carpets. Go to C. E.

Myers' for a good heating: stove AT COST. Best grades of barbed wire at Bird and Williams'. For bed-rock prices on hardware, go to C. E. Myers'.

O. P. C. S. now has its stock of fall and winter goods complete.

Come and see them. C. E. Myers has a large lot of heating stoves, which he is selling out AT COST. The O.

P. C. S. has the finest line of ladies' long and short wrapps in the county. At Franjfee's you will find torchon, fuchsia, burdian, dendelle, gimpure and all kinds of laces.

2 Sets per Gallon. Pure Head Light Oil that will not freeze for sale, at the drug store of S. M. Xeal Co. Prepare for the I'old Wave By buying your coal now.

stock now on Iiand Athracite, Canon City, Arkansas and Kansas Coals Going fast Come before it is gone. Loxg-Belx, Lumber Co. School Books School Books at S. M. Xeal Co.

City and Country Cuts. AV. Y. AVillingham has been under the weather a few days. Renew your subscription to the Tribune for volume two, which begins with this issue.

Garry Young went to Topeka on Tuesday on business in connection with his insurance agency. A very pleasant dancing party was given by John Black welder in the Spic-lin hall on Friday evening. We would like to suggest to our non-advertisers that we have plenty ff room now for their advertisements. Mrs. Evans, the estimable wife of the popular conductor, Sim Evans, is here once more, quartered at the Chillocco.

Charles Todd had both of his ears frozen as stiff as a chip while escorting his lady love home from the hop Friday evening. Sid King did not make his daily run to Anthony Saturday, owing to the blizzard. His hack made up the lost trip on Sunday. Geo. B.

Schr.ier spent Sunday in the city from Winfield. He is a son of H. B. Schuler, president of the State Bank of Bluff City. There will be a total eclipse of the moon, visible in this country, on the 28th of this month, from 3:30 to 6:30 o'clock a.

m. Mrs. P. F. Wright, who is in the millinery business at Arkansas City, is here from that place.

Mr. Wright is in business here. Deid. At the residence of Geo. Ambler, on Jan.

18, 1888, in the 23rd year of her age, Eliza Carter. The funeral took place to-day. ohn B. Stout came up from Bluff City yesterday. Although John don't take his seat for a long time yet, he is smiling and happy, Harper Sentinel.

As the Tribune enters upon a new volume with this number, a great many, if not quite all, subscriptions have expired. Come in and renew. The county commissioners have accepted the new jail, against which an injunction had been procured by the citizens of Harper, asking that a restraining order be granted prohibiting the commissioners from completing the same. The injunction was dissolved last term of court, and now the county jail is a fixed fact. With a terrific cold in his head, -And his eyelids heavy and sore, The editor sat in his broken ohair And bitterly, earnestly swore.

A youth dropped in with a poem, A man was there with a dun, And a chap had dropped in to tell him How the paper ought to be run. An irate subscriber h.ad told him That his sheet wasn't fit to be read. While another had carefully promised To punch the editor's head. The foreman was yelling for copy, And the wind whistled in at the door, And this, with a few other reasons, Is why the editor swore. But the angel who took it to heaven Recorded this verdict there "The jury find in the present case, 'Twas a justifiable swear." Jno.

D. Freeman is expected back soon from his health seeking trip to Washington Territory. C. W. Barnes left Sunday for California, in search of a new home and business.

His family remains here for the present. Lost. A fur glove of musk rat fur, the right hand glove. A suitable reward will be given on the return of the same to Dr. Fisk.

The next regular teachers' examination will be held at Anthony Kansas, in the public school Saturday, Jan. 28th 1888, commencing at 8:30 a. m. J. E.

Hutchinson, Co Supt. The Harper Shin Plaster says the Tribune carries dead ads. There is a great advance in the price of window glass and persons who live in glass houses should more than ever beware how they throw stones. A full-fledged blizzard struck the Bluff Friday night, and Saturday was the coldest day of the season. The ther mometer registered twelye degress below zero, which is a little colder than it usually gets in this sunny clime.

A gentleman at Anthony the other day -was -very indignant at a stranger, who took him for Isenburg, of the Harper Sentinel, and had it not been for friends, would certainly have handled him roughly. Mr. C. E. Myers, one of our popular hardware merchants, received a telegram on Monday announcing the severe sickness of his father at Caldwell.

Mr. Myers took the first train out for that place, remaining until last evening. He thinks his father now out of danger. T. A.

Lambert, one of the Frisco engineers, who owns a valuable residence property here, is taking a lay-off and visiting with his family. "Dad," as he is called, is as efficient in his trade as he is popular, and all wish him a pleasant rest and hope to see him in his cab again. Mrs. W. A.

Miller is receiving a visit from her parents, Mr. and Mrs. J. J. Cruger, of Ashland.

Mr. C. is troubled with weak eyes, and is enroute east for treatment. He owns a grocery at Ashland; also a farm near that town, and says there are not as many destitute people there as has been reported. Mrs.

Miller is highly delighted at receiving a visit from her father and mother. A Card of Tlianks. We wish to express our heart-felt thanks to our friends and acknowledge our appreciation of their kindness and sympathy during our great sorrow the sickness and death of our babe. Also to the members of the A. O.

U. W. who so kindly assisted in the last sad rites. J. W.

Arnold, C. E. Arnold. A letter received in this city yesterday by one of our prominent business men, was from Contractor Loonan and announces that ha has the contract for the construction of the Border road from BluIT City to Anthony. This popular contractor is to be congratulated for securing so desirable a job and quick work and good construction can as usual be expected from him.

All that holds matters back now is the frozen ground preventing the surveyors' stakes from being driven. Anthony Daily Republican. S. S. Clark, J.

G. Denhollem, E. P. Wright, J.R. Swartzel, Wm.

Moms, W. S. Robertson, Dr. Scribner, John Givens, Chas. Eisfelder, John Hutson, Jno.

W. R. J. Malone, Joe Lumley, Capt. Robson, and Mr.

N. M. Lemon were the names of the Odd Fellows that went from Caldwell Saturday night to Bluff City to institute a lodge at that place. It was expected that the Harper team would do the work but at the last moment word was received here that they could not attend and the members, above given, were called upon to do the work. The lodge starts out with flattering prospects, having seven charter members and the team initated 15 new members Saturday night.

The boys from here are loud in the praise of their treatment by the Bluff Cityites and report a glorious time. Supper was served three times, upon their arrival, at midnight and in the small hours of the morning. Work was finished at about 4:30 a. and the boys returned on the morning train. Caldwell Journal.

There is a growing feeling in England of the necessity of providing an improved commercial education for the young men. O.i every hand, says an English paper, we hear that foreigners are pushing Englishmen from the places in the commercial world they have been accustomed to occupy by reason of their superior qualifications and willingness to work harder for small pav. A boy in Cochvanton, evades the anti-ferret law a novel manner. He catches a rat in a box-trap, ties a string around the rats neck, takes the trap to the rabbit's hole, while the hunter holds the string. The rat generally chases tlu rabbit into the young man's hands.

T-Qoodness ia beauty in its best estate. A homely truth is better than a splendid error. -A man's life is half over before ha learns how to live. Shake han's wid a begah, an he'll t'ink yo'er one. Jadqe.

Some men dat am de ahkitects o.tj dair own fawchunes creek mighty crazy buildin's, Judge. Good intentions will not help a man on his way if ha takes, the wrong road. Somerville Journal. -rr-A rolling stone gathers no moss, but it knocks out all opposition at the foot of the 111 J. Washington Critic A spoken qf as rare ens tertainment" proved to be a performance not well done.

N. O. Picayune. The difference between the life of an old bachelor and the life cf an old maid is that one is fall of fun and the other isn't. Some people are as backward in paying their respects as though ret spects were another name for debts.

Texas Siflinga. Some Difference: First he fall in with your scheme?" Second Speculator "No, he tumbled to it!" Tid-Bits. Bjones, who is still a bachelor, says that he has learned from experience that a girl can smile and smile and be unwillin' still. Somerville Journal. It is one of the blessings of a free "and enlightened country like the United States that the law-abiding clt izen never, knows that he is governed until he gets married.

-Landlord Come, Sepp, that is the tenth match I've seen you strike. What have you lost?" Sepp 'Tm looking for a match that Tye dropped on the floor." German Joke. "So you are really going to marry old Moneybags?" said a friend to a New York belle. "Yes, indeed; but it's merely a dollars and sense arrangement; he furnishes the dollars and I the sense, you know." The Freshness of Youth. i Wlien we're getting along in years, And more of the world we see, It almost makes us weep to think How fresh we used to be.

-r-Boston Courier, 'I would perhaps say yes," said the gentle maiden to her dude lover, "if you had more push, more energy." "I could haye more push, more energy," he sail "if I had a mind." "If you had a mind! Yes, that's just it." Sweet Girl "Isn't Mr, Fortune-hunter splendid? He's been such a traveler." Rich Widows ''Spndid, indeed! He's the most unmannerly fellow I eyer met" "Unmannerly?" "He's positively insulting, I never want to speak to him again." Oh, I'm sure there's some mistake. What did he say?" "He asked me if I'd ever heard Jenny Lind," Qmahd World. Brown "You're a lucky dog, Robinson. So you married a girl worth half a million dollars in her own. right." binson (rather more sadly than the circumstances seem to war rant) "Yes." Brown "You ought to put up the drinks." Robinson "All right old Just wait while I run into the house and see if I cau get a dollar." Chicago Tribune.

HEY YORK'S SOCIETY. The Inner Circles of Swelldom Limited to Seven Hundred Members. A census of "good society" ha3 just been made in this city, and it is found that out of the population of nearly two millions counting in the metropolis and its suburbs only seven hundred are qualified to rank with the best. In a republic where the notion is outrageously general that behavior is the true test to worthiness, it requires an authoritative edict once in a while to squelch the leveling tendency. The Patriarchs have done the job this time.

They are an organization of intensely-swell gentlemen who give annual balls at dinonico's, and they put what they regard as their minds to tho drawing of the line distinctly between "society" and common people. The Patriarchs next ball is to occur shortly. Ward McAllister, an old beau of unquestioned standing, is the high mogul. Every autumn he makes out a careful list of ninety-nine other real gentlemen, making a hundred in all. They constitute the Patrian hs, and they were chosen recently.

They are assessed fifty dollars apiece for a fund with which to pay the costs of music and supper. Upon them is placed the awful responsibility of issuing invitations, for the documents are substantially credentials of the highest possible character, proving that the holder is "in society." Each one in the hundred names seven "persons. The number is based on a careful and critical estimate that there are no more than seven hundred men and women in all New York quite worthy of the glorious distinction. The separate lists of seven are sent to McAUistei', who calls a secret meeting of the entire hundred, to whom the names are" read, and a single vote against a candidate is sufficient for exclusion. All of which is fanny to the reader, but very momentous to the soterie of persons concerned.

When Mrs. William Astor gave a notable ball two years ag she extended her invitations to eight hundred, and was by her friends considered liberal, considering how sacred are the precincts of "society." Thus you will see that, 30 far as New York is concerned, there may be an "upper ten but towering altitudinously above them are less than one thousand of positive superlatives. Y. Cor. Pittsburg is pal of The London Lancet doubt3 tha persons who perish in burning buildings suffer so much as has been popularly supposed.

The victim is generally made faint and pulseless by the carbonic acid or carbonic-acid gas, and becomes insensible before the fire reaches him. The Japanese women of Osaka have formed a "Ladies' Christian Association," and at a recent meeting in the Y. M. C. A.

Hall in that place, an audience composed of ladies only is gaid to have numbered over 1.000. Groceri Highest market price kinds of country produce. Go to S. M. NEAL CO'S DRUG STORE For School Books.

Perfumes; STATIONERY. CIGARS, TOBACCO, ALBUMS AND All Ms of Paints, Oils, Varnish, Eic. Jno. G. Denhollem, tha deputy grandmaster of the Odd Fellows' association of the seventh congressional district of Kansas, was circulating among his brethren here a few days last week.

Mr. Denhollem and the Caldwell team had instituted the new lodge here, and his business here later was to write up the policies of the new members. We erred last week in stating that the Harper team did the work at the organization of the new lodge, as the credit of that Job is due the Caldwell boys, the team from Harper only assisting. Mr. Denhollem has a high standinsr in Odd Fellowship and the position he fills is an important one.

We were pleased to meet the gentleman and to renew our former acquaintance. Some men are always complaining about their business. When we hear such, we set them down as being men who can not appreciate their existence, otherwise they would drop what seems to be so unprofitable and take hold of something else that would prove more satisfactory to them. Every man should follow an occupation with which he can be pleased, and go to a country that he can speak a good word for conscientiously. A man who will not deft nd his home and business is not worthy of them.

The new county officials taking office Tuesday were John S. Gardner, sheriff, with Chas. H. Eastman, under sheriff and W. F.

Snapp and R. Barton deputy sheriffs; H. E. Patterson, county clerk with J. E.

Burnes deputy; B. F. Blue, register of deeds with D. M. Rodman temporary deputy.

Dr. C. S. Loyd, coroner succeeded A. J.

McAdams Mon day, there being no contest over this office, H. H. Jenkins succeeded himself in the surveyors office. The time for possession of the county treasurers office does not come for a whole year yet. Anthony Republican.

If there is one thing more than an other that grinds the enterprising journalist it is that he can not help the business of the advertiser without indirectly aiding that other fellow by his side. If any plan can be devised whereby a newspaper can bring business to the wide-awake patron without helping the sponge who grows because he can not avoid it that plan will be hailed with delight. We know the advertiser gets the most benefit, but we want a plan that will close the capillaries of the sponge entirely. The smarties who are proposing to redistrict the county place Anthony and Bluff City together the first slap the two heaviest communities in the county. Try again, boys, but remember that either Bluff City or Harper will have to be placed in a district with Attica to fulfil the law that is, if the present arrangement is changed.

It is an interesting puzzle, isn't it? Far more so than those who talk so glibely about it ever imagined. Anthony Republican. Card of Thanks. In behalf of Bluff City lodge 1. O.

O. we wish to thank the brethren of Caldwell lodge for the earnest and much needed work they did at the institution of our lodge. Had the brothers of the Border Queen lodge stayed at home that bleek night, Bluff City would still be without a lodge. Thanks, brethren, and remember the latch string is always out for any and all of your members. Will Hendricks, N.

G. W. A. Miller, Sec'y. Grocery, KANSAS, Harper county to buy paid for Butter and Eggs and all KANSAS.

Banting Business Transact; BLUFF CITY, THE UNION CANAL. A Work of Internal Improvement Suggested by William Penn. The Union canal, which was the first projected on the American continent, having been suggested by William Penn in 1690. and its route surveyed seventy years later, before there was a canal in operation even in England, is to be sold. The route on this canal was surveyed by David Rittenhouse, the astronomer, and Dr.

William Smith, provost of tha University of Pennsylvania, in 1762. It extended from the Schuylkill river, near Reading, to the Susquehanna, at the present site of Middletown, Dauphin County. It was the first link in a proposed chain of water communication between the Delaware river and Lake Erie, a project so gigantic for that early day, when canals and turnpikes were unknown, that the projectors were believed" by the people to be crazy. Rittenhouse planned a system of inclined planes to overcome the Allegheny mountains, a plan which was adopted seventy-five years later by the State in its old Portage railroad. The revolutionary war interrupted work on the pioneer canal, and in 1791 Robert Morris, Rbert Fulton, and Tench Francis became interested in it The work was too far in advance of the times, however, and it was not completed until 1827.

The canal is eignty-nme nines in lengtn, ana some of the greatest engineering work oi that day was necessary in its construction. The first tunnel in the United States was bored for this canal through nearly 800 feet of solid rock, and the summit vf the canal being higher than its terminal feeder, a pumping apparatus had lo ba constructed to raise the water to the necessary height. The canal cost Railroad transportation having made the ancient waterway unprofitable, a few years ago it was abandoned, and is now offered for Harrisburg (Fa.) Letter The Academy the other day distributed the annual "prizes of virtue." The Monty on prize of 2,000 francs was awarded to Jean Adolphe Delannoy, a Calais pilot who has twenty-one times risked hi3 life in 6aving shipwrecked crews. Delannoy is loaded with medals and wears the cross of the Legion of Honor. The Academy now proclaims him the most heroic and devoted of Frenchmen.

The other awards included 1.000 francs to Mr. Bonaparte Wvse for his survey and book on the P.iuauia canaL CHILLOCCO HOUSE. J. M. BYEKS, Proprietor.

First Class in Every Particular. TERMS $2.00 PER DAY. GOOD SAMPLE Corner of Main St and Central Avenae, BLUFF CITY. STATE BANK OF BLUFF- CITY. CAPITAL STOCK S50.00O.

H. B. SCHULER, President. W. T.

CLARK, CisMer. MONEY TO LOAN AT LOWEST RATES OP INTEREST ON APPROVED SECURITY. CoHectionB made and a General.